Self-Esteem and Motivation Reflection Essay Sample

Subject Name : Arts and Humanities

Introduction

The concern of the essay is to develop a reflective piece where the concept of self-esteem and self-concept would be defined from my perspective. The essay would be concerned with how the concepts are critical to my well-being as a whole along with the progression and development of life. Factors influencing the self-esteem and motivation of an individual positively or negatively would be the concern of the paper. In the course of the essay, I will reflect on the factors which have played a crucial role in shaping my motivation and self-esteem. My discussion on personal self-esteem would involve external and internal factors which have influenced it. I would also reflect on the moment when my self-esteem had been at its highest and lowest points.

Self Esteem and Motivation

Self-esteem refers to the subjective sense of an individual in regard to their overall personal value or worth. Similarly to self-respect, self-esteem is used to describe the confidence level in the attributes and abilities of the individual. A person with a healthy sense of self-esteem has the ability to influence their motivation their mental well-being along with their overall quality of life (Pezzulo et al., 2018). Self-esteem that is too low or high might turn out to be problematic. Each individual comes with a unique sense of self-esteem which allows the individual to strike a balance which is right for them. The key elements of self-esteem comprise self-confidence, a sense of security, a sense of identity, competence and a sense of belonging (McKay & Fanning, 2016).

Self-esteem affects the process of decision-making process along with our relationships emotional health along overall well-being. It has also been noted to affect the motivation quotient in individuals as individuals with a positive and healthy perspective of themselves have the capacity to understand their potential as well as feel inspired to strive through challenges. On the contrary people with low self-esteem are less sure about their abilities and find it difficult to take decisions (Choi et al., 2019). Such individuals also struggle in their relationships and separate themselves from improving as they are concerned with making them perfect. Self-esteem as a factor has been noted to play a crucial role in Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs which has depicted esteem to be the basic factor of human motivation. It has been suggested by Maslow that individuals require appreciation from outside people as well as from their inner self so as to develop a sense of esteem (Fallatah et al., 2018). These two needs are required to be fulfilled so as to make the individual capable enough to grow as an individual as well as attain self-actualization (Alberti & Zimbardo).

Self-esteem is however different from different from self-efficacy as it involves in terms of the extent one believes that they are capable of handling the actions of the future along with their abilities and performance. The factors which affect Self-esteem include factors like disability, age, physical abilities, and patterns in thought processes. Socioeconomic factors have also been noted to play a role in having an impact on the personality. Life experience alongside genetics has been considered to be the most important factor influencing the self-esteem in an individual (Minev et al., 2018). There are several other theories which have been considered while dealing with self-esteem. One of the self-esteem theories proposed by William James suggests that it is a measure of the success attained by an individual divided by their pretensions (McKay & Fanning, 2016).

Self-esteem theory by Rosenberg suggests that one negative and positive attitude towards a particular self and one's evaluation of their feelings and thoughts in overall relation to oneself. It has been noted that depression and self-esteem are empirically related to one another and the individuals who suffer from low self-esteem tend to be more prone to depression. In both its milder form as well as on the clinical level people who are depressed have experienced a greater tendency of inadequacy. Incompetency and worthlessness (Helwig & Ruprecht, 2017).

Self-esteem has the capacity to be influenced by cultural standards and the extent to which these standards are being met by individuals. Certain perspectives have also indicated that self-esteem is a universal need which has been constructed culture differently. It is reflected as a cultural construction. Researchers have reflected upon the factors which influence self-esteem in a cultural setup are four. These are control over individuals are control over one's life, one's duty, social status being achieved and other benefits (Harris & Orth, 2020).

Factors Affecting Self-Esteem

Parental Style, Parenting and Self-Esteem

It has been noted that parenting style has a considerable impact on the self-esteem of individuals. Parenting continues to be the most taxing and demanding as well as valuable experience which is satisfying. Parenting style is affected by the degree of warmth of the parents that they exhibit towards their children. The study has shown that higher self-esteem along with a good social experience, acceptance from peers and lower levels of aggressive and anti-social behaviour are likely to be reflected in the children who have been through an authoritative parenting style. It has been reflected that authoritarian parents are the ones who spread toughness and rigidness so as to extend control over their children. The parents who are not vocal about their support and love for their children are like to develop as children with low self-esteem. As per the PAR and also evoking the family system theory it has been reflected that parenting style is the key to the development of self-esteem in an individual. It has been elucidated in the course of the discussion that parental rejection along with the protection of parental control is likely to create a negative impact on the mental health of adolescents by lowering the self-esteem of the individual (Perez-Fuentes et al., 2019).

Self Esteem and Gender

Self-esteem has been recognized widely as the central attribute of psychological functioning during adolescence. It has been noted that boys tend to have greater self-esteem as opposed to girls during the period of adolescence. One way in which this can be explained is the differences in the gender role. This is also reflective of the fact that many qualities which are associated with the male role have been consistent with high self-esteem. Adolescence which is a period of transition between adulthood and childhood is accompanied by dramatic as well as often difficult changes in the life of the young person (Wang et al., 2020). The factors of changes involve cognitive, social, environmental and biological factors which have contributed towards influencing the person's development in adolescence along with their self-esteem. Studies have reflected upon the fact that adolescent girls are likely to have lower self-esteem and assess their physical attributes negatively and intellectual abilities as compared to boys. These findings reflect why there has been considerable incidents of suicide, and eating disorder which are found to be substantially higher in girls (Mohammadzadeh et al., 2018).

Self-esteem and Relationships

Research has shown how self-esteem can influence the relationship satisfaction of an individual as of the ones surrounding. Once an individual tends to feel differently it affects the ways in which they interact with their significant others. Research has shown that low self-esteem is able to distort the perception of the partner. It has been noted that individuals who have experienced low self-esteem in their relationships are not only intimidated by the imperfections of their partner but also view their relationships in terms of bad or good. They tend to view their relationships in polarized terms. Predictability becomes crucial in the relationship which emerges as a key indicator of the intimacy and its quality which are shared between the couple. Whether the individual is lagging in self-esteem the best point would be to start by noticing the negative attributes of self (Carter, 2018).

Our Internal Dialogues

I would like to reflect upon my personal attributes which have played a crucial role in shaping my self-esteem. I am quite a short lady with brown hair and brown eyes, I am very bubbly and outgoing but shy in unknown settings. I was born two weeks late and the first thing I did was spit my dummy out at my dad so he says from there he knew I was going to be feisty. I play soccer and used to dance, I love to gym and go out with my friends. I have just recently bought a house and my boyfriend and I have been raising a pit bull for the last two years which is like our child. I have been independent for a very long time hence why I work and study my parents didn't have money to afford my studies and for me to be at home while studying which hence why I have a full-time job (Barbot, 2020).

I have lost my grandparents at a young age. My friends have played a big role in my life but I have developed trust issues. I developed as an independent individual as my parents had been extremely busy with their work and another course. I have an unstable self-esteem in life as my life has taken me through a rollercoaster ride. Self-esteem takes numerous forms where people experience dramatic shifts from a positive feeling. Certain individuals tend to experience dramatic shifts in their feelings from feeling positive to certain negative feelings about themselves. For me my unhappy childhood can be evoked as a reason for my low self-esteem and lack of trust (Mruk, 2013).

My inner voice always keeps me confused and I struggle to find a base of existence while questioning every action that I take. I doubt individuals when I connect with them for the first time and maybe this is the reason why I also find it difficult to form associations with people. Academic performance has also been another area of concern where poor academic performance has resulted in a lack of confidence. I had also experienced financial troubles as well as breakdowns in my relationships have also contributed to my lowered self-esteem. My 3 years relationship also ended badly as he was very disloyal (Minev et al., 2018).

Self-concept

Self-concept refers to the behaviours along with the abilities and beliefs about themselves which can be understood from the responses of the others. The understanding of the self can be referred to as the ability of the individual to understand their action, reactions and behaviours. My self-concept had been affected by my wounded experience in my childhood, the failures of my parents, and the death of my grandparents, my physical features and my relationships are likely to affect my self-concept.

Self-compassion in my opinion is very crucial to be considered especially when I have gone through a tough childhood. Self-esteem refers to the degree to which we need to evaluate ourselves positively. It has been represented by how we tend to value and like ourselves and thereby based on the comparison of others. As opposed to self-compassion which is not based on evaluation and positive judgments and thereby comes as a way of relating to ourselves.

Theoretically, it has been reflected that people with self-compassion are likely to have a higher self-esteem which I am trying to develop for myself. I am working toward developing a sense of self-esteem (Hilbert et al., 2019). I feel that self-compassion is connected with the source of self-esteem. Self-esteem comes with core elements which are common humanity, kindness and mindfulness. I have developed a lower sense of trust which is why I am trying to love myself and also trying to be more kind to myself so that I can develop a better relationship with people around me.

Cognitive distortions involve thinking negatively about others and self and are thereby hypothesized by the experience of others who are likely to experience distortions cognitively frequently thereby it has been impacted by the ones who tend to engage in the maladaptive style of humour which is likely to be more congruent with the thoughts that are automatic. Self-talks which are negative likely to rob people of their happiness which makes the people miserable and can lead to depression and illness. It also contributes towards negative filtering which is considered cognitive distortion. Self-esteem can be improved through forgiveness and thereby letting people let go of the negative feeling but it also requires one to be kind to oneself. It is reflected upon the process which has helped one from their past wounds and thereby maintain a positive outlook towards life. Forgiveness contributes towards developing a healthier relationship along with less anxiety as well as less stress and less hostility (Barbot, 2020).

Conclusion

In order to conclude it can be stated that self-esteem is crucial in developing the self of one's attributes towards life. The experience of one in their life plays a crucial role in developing their sense of self-esteem. An unhappy childhood and others cause lower self-esteem in an individual. Experiences contribute towards making fragile self-esteem where there has been a lowered self-worth and thereby it has been unstable and uncertain and thereby has been based on unrealistically for developing self-views in regard to the challenges that they experience around them. I am gradually learning from my past experiences and trying to be kind to myself to develop my own self-esteem. I am also trying to enter into a conversation with myself so as to be more kind to myself.

References

Alberti, R. E., & Zimbardo, P. G. McKay and Fanning recognize the complexity of the human tendency toward self-criticism. Their carefully written, cognitively oriented self-help book wisely avoids simplistic solutions, offering instead a systematic approach to self-esteem development. https://nibmehub.com/opac-service/pdf/read/Self-Esteem%20_%20a%20proven%20program%20of%20cognitive%20techniques%20for%20assessing-%20improving-%20and%20maintaining%20your%20self-esteem-%204th%20Edition.pdf

Barbot, B., (2020). Creativity and self‐esteem in adolescence: A study of their domain‐specific, multivariate relationships. The Journal of Creative Behavior, 54(2), pp.279-292. https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1002/jocb.365

Carter, J. S. (2018). Stress and self-esteem in adolescence predict physical activity and sedentary behavior in adulthood. Mental Health and Physical Activity, 14, 90-97. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S175529661730073X

Choi, Y., Choi, S. H., Yun, J. Y., Lim, J. A., Kwon, Y., Lee, H. Y., & Jang, J. H. (2019). The relationship between levels of self-esteem and the development of depression in young adults with mild depressive symptoms. Medicine, 98(42). https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6824750/

Fallatah, R. H. M., Syed, J., Fallatah, R. H. M., & Syed, J. (2018). A critical review of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. Employee motivation in Saudi Arabia: An investigation into the higher education sector, 19-59. https://link.springer.com/chapter/10.1007/978-3-319-67741-5_2

Harris, M. A., & Orth, U. (2020). The link between self-esteem and social relationships: A meta-analysis of longitudinal studies. Journal of personality and social psychology, 119(6), 1459. https://psycnet.apa.org/journals/psp/119/6/1459/

Helwig, N. E., & Ruprecht, M. R. (2017). Age, gender, and self-esteem: A sociocultural look through a nonparametric lens. Archives of Scientific Psychology, 5(1), 19. https://psycnet.apa.org/journals/arc/5/1/19/

Hilbert, S., Goerigk, S., Padberg, F., Nadjiri, A., Übleis, A., Jobst, A., ... & Sarubin, N. (2019). The role of self-esteem in depression: A longitudinal study. Behavioural and Cognitive Psychotherapy, 47(2), 244-250. https://www.cambridge.org/core/journals/behavioural-and-cognitive-psychotherapy/article/role-of-selfesteem-in-depression-a-longitudinal-study/5DD05205611975C8D268A8CBAC43D73D

McKay, M., & Fanning, P. (2016). Self-esteem: A proven program of cognitive techniques for assessing, improving, and maintaining your self-esteem. New Harbinger Publications. https://books.google.com/books?hl=en&lr=&id=E8qjDAAAQBAJ&oi=fnd&pg=PR5&dq=Accurate+self+assessment+McKay+and+Fanning&ots=NLArZb2S-o&sig=8NZfQhlA_IbPqWfn2J8E1cuISSQ

McKay, M., & Fanning, P. (2016). Self-esteem: A proven program of cognitive techniques for assessing, improving, and maintaining your self-esteem. New Harbinger Publications. https://books.google.com/books?hl=en&lr=&id=E8qjDAAAQBAJ&oi=fnd&pg=PR5&dq=Cognitive+distortion+McKay+and+Fanning&ots=NLArZb2TYo&sig=M3uAswaiEUuwnoGpJ5t9ftEdE64

Minev, M., Petrova, B., Mineva, K., Petkova, M. & Strebkova, R., (2018). Self-esteem in adolescents. Trakia Journal of Sciences, 16(2), pp.114-118. http://tru.uni-sz.bg/tsj/N2,%20Vol.16,%202018/M.Minev.pdf

Minev, M., Petrova, B., Mineva, K., Petkova, M., & Strebkova, R. (2018). Self-esteem in adolescents. Trakia Journal of Sciences, 16(2), 114-118. http://tru.uni-sz.bg/tsj/N2,%20Vol.16,%202018/M.Minev.pdf

Mohammadzadeh, M., Awang, H., Kadir Shahar, H., & Ismail, S. (2018). Emotional health and self-esteem among adolescents in Malaysian orphanages. Community mental health journal, 54, 117-125. https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10597-017-0128-5

Mruk, C. J. (2013). Self-esteem and positive psychology: Research, theory, and practice. Springer Publishing Company. https://books.google.com/books?hl=en&lr=&id=-lo3yg4U9AAC&oi=fnd&pg=PP2&dq=Self+esteem+and+positive+psychology.+Research,+theory+and+practice&ots=sfLaXwuOOK&sig=jsUxTFeponYQz5vaKcj0VmOxDoo

Perez-Fuentes, M. D. C., Molero Jurado, M. D. M., Gazquez Linares, J. J., Oropesa Ruiz, N. F., Simon Marquez, M. D. M., & Saracostti, M. (2019). Parenting practices, life satisfaction, and the role of self-esteem in adolescents. International journal of environmental research and public health, 16(20), 4045. https://www.mdpi.com/1660-4601/16/20/4045

Pezzulo, G., Rigoli, F., & Friston, K. J. (2018). Hierarchical active inference: a theory of motivated control. Trends in cognitive sciences, 22(4), 294-306. https://www.cell.com/trends/cognitive-sciences/fulltext/S1364-6613(18)30022-6

Wang, X., Gao, L., Yang, J., Zhao, F., & Wang, P. (2020). Parental phubbing and adolescents’ depressive symptoms: Self-esteem and perceived social support as moderators. Journal of youth and adolescence, 49, 427-437. https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10964-019-01185-x

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